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Published: July 4, 2025
🕒 Estimated read time: 4 minutes
Do you ever catch yourself wondering: How did we get here? Did I marry the wrong person? Why can’t this be easier? Are we headed for divorce? Is this really how our marriage will always be?
After working with couples for more than 35 years, I can tell you these questions are heartbreakingly common. Many couples share that they feel stuck — hopeless about changing their relationship into something better.
They’ve read the books, gone on the retreats, listened to the podcasts, taken advice from well-meaning friends — and yet they’re still circling the same old conflicts, fighting the same tired battles, and feeling more discouraged than ever. For some, it feels like the only options left are divorce or settling for lifelong disconnection.
So, what’s missing?
The belief that change is truly possible — and sustainable. Many couples can’t imagine that they can actually shift the way they relate to each other and keep it that way. It feels out of reach.
Does this sound familiar?
It makes sense if it does. You’ve probably tried all the “tips and tricks,” maybe even felt a glimmer of hope after a workshop or a good conversation — but soon enough, you slip right back into old patterns. The new ideas fade. The same arguments creep back in. And you start to wonder if people really can change.
Over time, every failed attempt chips away at your hope. You start to believe change isn’t possible for you.
But here’s the truth: Change is happening in you all the time.
Think about it. Physically, your body is always renewing itself — shedding old skin, growing new cells, getting a little stronger or weaker each day based on how you move and care for it.
Mentally and emotionally, you’re changing too. A comment you overhear, a compliment from your partner, a conversation with a friend — any of these can shift how you feel about yourself, each other, and your relationship.
In other words, change is constant. The real question is: Will you choose the direction of that change?
You have the power to decide what you want to change — in yourself and in your relationship — and to follow through. But trying to do this alone can feel overwhelming.
This is where the right guide makes all the difference.
A trusted coach can help you tap into the part of you that wants something better. They can show you proven steps to break old patterns, help you see how you’re contributing — both to the struggle and the healing — and encourage you when your motivation wanes.
They’ll hold you accountable as you practice new ways of listening, communicating, and connecting. They’ll remind you what’s possible when you feel stuck. And they’ll celebrate with you as you notice real change — more connection, trust, romance, empathy, understanding, and joy.
Belief in yourself — that you’re capable of changing.
Belief in your partner — that they can grow alongside you.
Belief in your relationship — that it can be a source of deep love, safety, and satisfaction.
You are worthy of a relationship where you both feel seen, supported, and loved. And you can create it — together.
Belief is the secret ingredient that makes real change possible.
Ready to believe again? Let’s begin.
With love,
Dr Carol
With love,
Carol
Dr. Carol J Henry
P.S. And if this resonates, feel free to share it with someone who’s also doing the work to stay connected.
📩 Email: carol@drcaroljhenry.com
📲 Instagram DM: @drcaroljhenry
📞 Schedule a Free Call: https://calendly.com/carol-j-henryphd/discovery-call
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For more relationship information and advice, contact me: Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube, Pinterest, Instagram, or email me at carol@drcaroljhenry.com
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